A Little Advice on Changing Flight.

So here is the thing.

I have a  return flight, instead, for some reasons I didn't take the flight going to Jakarta. Instead, I took another different flight. But when I wanted to use my return ticket back to Malaysia using the previous ticket, somehow my name was gone in the system. Luckily the Malaysia Airline counter there did managed to get my name back in the list, and here I am, back home.

So, next time, when any of you changed your flight, using a different airline, then I would strongly suggest you to check back with the airline whether your previous ticket is still valid or not, because system wise, your name will be removed from the list.

Let's travel!!!

Bangkok or Thailand?

To be honest, I don't know the tiny details of what is happening is Thailand. But what is within my knowledge is that the opposition, led by The Democrats is trying their best to oust the current Prime Minister, Ms. Yingluck Shinawatra. This happens when she and the government which everyone are well known of, is that they are pro Thaksin, former Prime Minister who is accused of wrongdoings during his premiership, is seems trying to bring back the former leader by pushing for an amnesty approval.

That gives a chance for the opposition to start their rally and demonstrations, which I believe they are very good at. Some protesters even commented that "Thailand has enough and they want a new leader".

Ok. So here comes the part where I do not understand about. So, if Thailand wants a new leader, why when Ms. Yingluck dissolved the parliament and called for a new election, the Democrats, which is the largest opposition backed down and boycotted the race? If some of you did not know, there are 2 times if I am not mistaken that a pro-Thaksin government was toppled, and took over by military. But every after election, let see who won... hermm, oh, it's them again! 

The Government has their stronghold outside Bangkok, they won not with small majority, they won big. So what may I ask now is that, is it really what the people of Thailand wanted, or is it only what the people on the street wanted? Why don't you just let the majority decide, not the people on the street. It is not helping the country at all.

Dear Jaffrey.

Do you still remember the actual reason you put this blog on?

Because you are forgetful.

You were afraid that someday you will forget everything.

The people, the feeling, the life, the memories.

So, thank you blog.

I can now recall and live that moments again.

Till We Meet Again...

On the first day, I wished so bad the 6 months course to be over quickly without me realizing it. I missed home. I missed working. I missed my colleagues. I missed everything that I'd left behind.As time goes by, relationships were built. The barrier and the wall, the mask were all gone. We faced many challenges, unkind forces that tried to put us down, but thanks to them, they unite us all. We pulled each other up. We held each other's hand, and just be one.

From strangers, we turned out to be good friends. Here, we are all family to each other. Brothers and sisters, some of us did called us that. Looking at them, I tried to be a better person as they are. With them, it's ok not to know, because they will taught me how and never in their intention to look down on me. I've never had such an enormous support from a group of friends. 

I will miss all the moments, every single one. I will miss all the 'anak ayam' or when people asked 'tak ada kawan lain ke?' moments. Despite whatever people said, they are friends I've chosen to spend this short period of time left before we separated. Every single thing we do, we do it together. Makan, solat, main, pergi kelas, lepak, main bowling, buat project or program, perform, futsal, konvoi balik kampung, sailang program orang lain... As the last days were reaching, I reminded myself to appreciate all the time that had left. And I hope I will never forget how happy I am whenever they were around. The laughter, the tears...

They are true inspiration to me. And I genuinely feel their care and love towards me throughout these past 6 months. I wish these great people happiness, good health and career. I am sure some of our life's path will crossed each other in the future. But for the meantime, I will cherish all the memories, and miss them greatly...

Till we meet again, my friends. Take care.

To Do List Before 35!

Life would be a little bit lame when there are no goals. Everyone should have a list of things to do or places to go before they die. Even every country has their own long term, mid term or short term plan. As for Malaysia, it's the Malaysia Plan which will be released every 5 years.

I have my own as well, but to make it easier and exciting, I here then will update the status of my challenges to reach the goals I've listed, a To Do List Before I reach 35, which is 8 years from now. So here it goes.

1. Owning a house is now crucial in Malaysia when price is hiking fast. Yet, I have not decided where to own one when I will be moving a lot later on. I would love to settle down somewhere in Perak of course, where my parents and in laws are. Choices I have now are either to buy a house in the city and turn it into a rental properties or get a land in Perak and wait till I get a little bit older to build one. Challenge #1 : Own a property
2. I love travelling. So this must be a part of my list. To travel far frequently would be financially difficult. So at the moment, before I reach 35, travelling to places nearby is good enough. Then after 35, the region to travel maybe could be extended further. At the moment, I've been to Singapore, Philippines (of course), Thailand, Indonesia, Vietnam, UK, Sweden and Norway. So... Challenge #2 : Travel to every South Korea, China, Turkey
3. Earning a Degree or a Bachelor is seems not enough. People are trying to go further with their studies to the level of Master or PhD. I don't know whether at the moment I am capable to include studies in my married schedule. Life seems hectic at the moment. But if not now, then when? Challenge #3 : Earn a Master
4. Last time when I was with my previous company, I went to Basic Japanese Language class as everyone thought that I was leaving to that country for a 2 years program, I did leave, but only to different employer. Hehe. I would love to continue such classes, but I don't know whether Nihon Go is helpful for me now. Arabic or Mandarin would be awesome though. Challenge #4 : Learn A Third Language

So guys, jom. Let's make some goals and starts planning!

Understanding Malaysians.

Obviously, many people in the world are already aware that we Malaysians are multiracial society, and we have accepted different cultures, beliefs and celebrations in our daily surroundings. But my question is now, yes we have accepted the differences, but do we really understand them?

Last week, my friends and I organized an event which involved many of us, and as always, Malays, Chinese and Indians were there of course. So while the ongoing program was moving on, we served breakfast, which we packed some local 'kuih' which on of them was Karipap. We never knew what was inside the karipap, until an Indian friend of mine said there was meat. She said that some Hindus are vegetarians on Fridays, and she had accidentally ate the meat, and she really felt so bad about it.

Oh man... I felt as bad as she was for not being considerate, a totally ignorance. I never knew there was time when Hindus and Buddhists are vegetarians, which I asked, Fridays for Hindus and during the early and middle of Lunar months for the Buddhists (correct me if I am wrong). I, as a Muslim myself would like my other Malaysians friends to know when we do we perform our fasting, what could be eaten and what not, or everything which involve them. 

So guys, let us be more considerate. We should not only ask people to understand us, we should understand them as well. After all we are all Malaysians.

A First Class Society.

I came across an article in a well known Malaysian blog, claiming that Malaysia is the world champion in corruption. Maybe some people would think that I'm being defensive as a government officer, but I'm so definitely sure that this article is not true and totally unreliable. If there are readers who believed that, then I guess they are like the dust under the bed where all the could judge is the darkness of the surroundings, full of ignorance and I felt sorry for them. If you ever been to the neighboring countries, then you'll know how much we are better in term corruption.

 I wonder how a 1,000 corespondents survey could conclude a whole report only with a percentage of perception? Have you never heard of Corruption Perception Index on which Malaysia is ranked #54 released by Transparency International. It is not established simply with 1,000 corespondents, but it came from 13 well known bodies including World Economic Forum and World Bank. The surveys do not cover only the public, but they include business people opinion and assessment of a group of analysts. I am not saying that we are good enough at #54, but the fact that we are the champion of corruption is not true at all.

The main issue here is not that the news written is a lie, but the way 'some people' think without any critical judgment. What makes it more pathetic is that these 'some people' really thought that this lie should be spread out just to give bad impressions on the government by sharing it online. To me, vision 2020 to reform Malaysia as a developed country is possible, but I doubt that we would have a first class mindset society if many of us would react and accept any negative news about the country without any research or investigation. What is the point of having all the 'world' on your finger when what you do is only sharing lies?

Oh, Malaysiaku.

Cakes : Strawberry Vanilla

Oh, I should have write posts about cakes, because I love them so much.

As I said previously, cakes represent happiness and celebration! Hehe. 

Last week, I had this cake, Strawberry Vanilla by Secret Recipe, and it was awesome. It was not too sweet, just nice. There were fresh strawberry toppings with layers of vanilla sponge, with vanilla cream and strawberry sandwiches in between.

A definitely 5 star cake.

*****

Thank you for the wonderful wishes and presents ;-)

Calypsorous.

100 days ago, I started my 6 months course somewhere in the north. With many unknown faces during the registration day, I doubt that the life here would be something that I like and I wished time would pass by so fast that I would not even realize it. After separated into 4 groups, with 52 of us, we named ourselves Calypso, or Calypsorous as the representatives of the members. We claimed that Calypso means, 'The Cool Leaders', and I guess it is totally true when after sometime, I realized that we never seems to get so eager to achieve anything, but the fact that, we did achieve a lot.

As time goes by, eventually we became so close and it felt like we are a big family. We spent nights and days together, completing assignments, program planning, showcase preparation, camping and of course, 'lepaking'. 3 month may sound so short, but it felt more. During this period of time, we accepted each other's flaws and together we improve for the better. It's ok if we failed or didn't know any particular task because at everytime, there will always be someone who will guide. 

We shared drinks and foods, we went hiking and got lost together, listening to ustaz's tazkirah while leaning on each other because of exhaustion, exercised, studied, having breakfast, lunch, dinner, supper, breakfasting, played bowling, went out to Pasar Ramadan, 'berjoget dan bergoyang', performing Veen's movement, laughing at each other's pose while sleeping in class, sharing photos and stories, playing games, gossiping, organizing events and tons more,

The bond was (and still) so strong that we got so upset when we were separated to different groups yesterday.  Everyone's character has blended so well it felt so right to be in the group. My heart literally stopped when someone else cheered for the group. It was the cheer that we created, it was the cheer that we bring to every tournaments and games, it was ours...

There's nothing much we can do about it, but to put this into a positive perspective. Maybe now we're no longer a group that were once put together, but from now on, it's a friendship, brotherhood that I've buried deep inside my heart. Only within this short period of time, I've met with many talented, inspiring, good and kind people and I love to have them as friends for the rest of my life.

Eventually, we became the person of whom we spend most of our time with. 
Someday, I may forget the good times we had together, and I hope this post will bring me back to the past and relive the moments.

Thank you Calypsorous.

Once a Calypsorous, always a Calypsorous.

A Good Advice On Marriage.

source:  Love Story From A Male Perspective

I read this article on a blog via Facebook. It is a good reminder for every husbands to cherish their wives for the rest of their lives. A good reminder for me as well as a new husband. ;)

Beautiful advice from a divorced man after 16 years of marriage

My advice after a divorce following 16 years of marriage, by Gerald Rogers.

Obviously, I’m not a relationship expert. But there’s something about my divorce being finalized this week that gives me perspective of things I wish I would have done different… After losing a woman that I loved, and a marriage of almost 16 years, here’s the advice I wish I would have had

1. Never stop courting. Never stop dating. NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love.

2. Protect your own heart. Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.

3. Fall in love over and over again.  You will constantly change. You’re not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don’t take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal you out completely, and you may never be able to get it back. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her.

4. Always see the best in her. Focus only on what you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. If you focus on what you love, you can’t help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife.

5. It’s not your job to change or fix her… your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing. And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it’s what you wanted or not.

6. Take full accountability for your own emotions: It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy, and she CAN’T make you sad. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.

7. Never blame your wife if you get frustrated or angry at her, it is only because it is triggering something inside of YOU. They are YOUR emotions, and your responsibility. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them… when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were.

8. Allow your woman to just be. When she’s sad or upset, it’s not your job to fix it, it’s your job to HOLD HER and let her know it’s ok. Let her know that you hear her, and that she’s important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean. The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you… DON’T RUN-AWAY WHEN SHE’S UPSET. Stand present and strong and let her know you aren’t going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion.

9. Be silly… don’t take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier.

10. Fill her soul everyday… learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and CHERISHED. Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen.

11. Be present. Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully WITH HER. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is.

12. Be willing to take her sexually, to carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully.

13. Don’t be an idiot…. And don’t be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make. You’re not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid.

14. Give her space… The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing…. (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point. Tell her to take time for herself, ESPECIALLY after you have kids. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world.)

15. Be vulnerable… you don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes.

16. Be fully transparent. If you want to have trust you must be willing to share EVERYTHING… Especially those things you don’t want to share. It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don’t know i she will like what she finds… Part of that courage is allowing her to love you completely, your darkness as well as your light. DROP THE MASK… If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be.

17. Never stop growing together… The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.

18. Don’t worry about money. Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win.

19. Forgive immediately and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don’t let your history hold you hostage. Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back. FORGIVENESS IS FREEDOM. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love.

20. Always choose love. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure.

In the end marriage isn’t about happily ever after. It’s about work. And a commitment to grow together and a willingness to continually invest in creating something that can endure eternity. Through that work, the happiness will come. Marriage is life, and it will bring ups and downs. Embracing all of the cycles and learning to learn from and love each experience will bring the strength and perspective to keep building, one brick at a time.

These are lessons I learned the hard way. These are lessons I learned too late. But these are lessons I am learning and committed in carrying forward. Truth is, I loved being married, and in time, I will get married again, and when I do, I will build it with a foundation that will endure any storm and any amount of time.

If you are reading this and find wisdom in my pain, share it those those young husbands whose hearts are still full of hope, and with those couples you may know who may have forgotten how to love. One of those men may be like I was, and in these hard earned lessons perhaps something will awaken in him and he will learn to be the man his lady has been waiting for.

MEN- THIS IS YOUR CHARGE: Commit to being an EPIC LOVER. There is no greater challenge, and no greater prize. Your woman deserves that from. Be the type of husband your wife can’t help but brag about.